This quote makes me think of many times in our lives when we are so busy planning BIG things that we forget that it's the many little things that really make a difference. I remember a story from the Oprah Show when she interviewed a mom who was dying of cancer and her daughter was asked what she remembered after her mother passed away. Her favorite memory was eating Cheerios late at night with her mother; it wasn't a big trip or a big thing. This also reminds me of the time that we shared with our exchange student who we hosted for one month during this past summer. I was so busy planning our outings and special trips, but in the end, when I asked him what he enjoyed the most, he replied that he enjoyed "spending time with family and especially making waffles and pancakes for breakfast." A humble reminder for me to continue to look out for the little things each day.
"Enjoy the little things; you may look back and realize they were the big things."
This quote makes me think of many times in our lives when we are so busy planning BIG things that we forget that it's the many little things that really make a difference. I remember a story from the Oprah Show when she interviewed a mom who was dying of cancer and her daughter was asked what she remembered after her mother passed away. Her favorite memory was eating Cheerios late at night with her mother; it wasn't a big trip or a big thing. This also reminds me of the time that we shared with our exchange student who we hosted for one month during this past summer. I was so busy planning our outings and special trips, but in the end, when I asked him what he enjoyed the most, he replied that he enjoyed "spending time with family and especially making waffles and pancakes for breakfast." A humble reminder for me to continue to look out for the little things each day.
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There are moments in my life where I just stop. I stop and take a mental picture of what is before me and sometimes I just quietly rejoice in how blessed I am to live where I live and to be loved how I am loved. Other times, I do a happy dance for all to see and squeal with joy at the wonders that I witness. Recently, there have been a few times when I have stopped to indulge in some simple yet extraordinary things. The other night while I was out walking with a friend, I gazed up and was delightfully surprised by the full moon. "Look! Look at the moon!" I exclaimed, which MAY have frightened my friend. "What!?! What!?! I see it. What do you want me to do?" my friend replied. Nothing, I thought...I just wanted my friend to stop and enjoy it, maybe as much as I did. Later that week, I was at work and had to pull my car to the side of the road so that I could snap the picture above of the deer grazing on the hill with the Pacific Ocean in the backdrop, and another time this year, I stopped to enjoy the breathtaking view of the San Clemente Pier, as I shared an unforgettable day with longtime friends. In my mind and in my heart, I hold a database of these mental pictures and the memories of the joy that I have experienced in just taking a moment to stop and appreciate these small things. It makes me think of a quote that I have hanging in my room which says, "Enjoy the little things; you may look back and realize they were the big things."
In his memoir, Always Looking Up: The Adventures of an Incurable Optimist, Michael J. Fox described all the members of his family as having "oversized personalities in undersized bodies". I wonder if we are related. :0)
One way that I have found to fit in reading books that I want to read is to get them as audiobooks and listen to them while I drive or walk. My latest favorite book is Michael J. Fox's Always Looking Up: The Adventures of An Incurable Optimist. Listening to the book is like having Michael J. Fox himself personally describe his journey with Parkinson's Disease and his incredible outlook upon life. (Sidenote: I bought the audiobook for 67 cents on half.com (#stoptosave)--it was about $3 total with shipping.) Below is a quote that he opens the book with--it stood out to me when I was listening to the book and has made me pause several times this week to think about times in my own life when I have felt like something was taken from me, only to realize later that something even greater was actually given. It is moments like these that keep me looking up, just like Michael J. Fox.
"For everything this disease has taken, something with greater value has been given--sometimes just a marker that points me in a new direction that I might not otherwise have traveled. So, sure, it may be one step forward and two steps back, but after a time with Parkinson's, I've learned that what is important is making that one step count; always looking up." ~Michael J. Fox. I began reading The Tipping Point by Malcom Gladwell today, and these quotes have really made me stop to think.
"Six degrees of separation doesn't mean that everyone is linked to everyone else in just six steps. It means that a very small number of people are linked to everyone else in a few steps, and the rest of us are linked to the world through those special few." "My social circle is, in reality, not a circle. It is a pyramid. And at the top of the pyramid is a single person..." "Connectors [are] people with a special gift for bringing the world together." "Sprinkled among every walk of life, in other words, are a handful of people with a truly extraordinary knack of making friends and acquaintances. They are Connectors." "People weren't getting their jobs through their friends. They were getting them through their acquaintances...when it comes to finding out about new jobs--or, for that matter, new information, or new ideas--'weak ties' are always more important than strong ties. Your friends, after all, occupy the same world that you do. They might work with you, or live near you, and go to the same churches, schools, or parties. How much, then, would they know that you wouldn't know? Your acquaintances, on the other hand, by definition occupy a very different world than you. They are much more likely to know something that you don't...Acquaintances, in short, represent a source of social power, and the more acquaintances you have the more powerful you are." It's August 1st, a definitive marker to note that summer will soon be over. Last night I had a chance to reflect upon the summer with my two sons. For the last couple of years, I have asked my sons to set summer goals--
1) to learn something new, 2) to improve in something they already know how to do, and 3) to complete a service project. I began encouraging them to do this years ago because I didn't want the summer to pass and have them realize that they had remained stagnant and had not grown in any way. Society expects men to know certain things--from fixing cars to repairing things around the house to knowing how to be a leader in many different contexts. But in raising my sons, I have learned firsthand that men don't just naturally learn these lessons--they must be taught through intentional efforts. So in the past couple of summers, my boys (men) have learned valuable lessons like how to fix a flat tire, how to repair a squeaky door, cook a meal, plant and maintain a garden, and how to set up a time to volunteer at a our local food pantry. These are small steps in our overall goal to prepare our sons to thrive in the world. I hope that my sons will one day (either now or later) stop to think about how their summer goals have contributed to the men that they are becoming. I was listening to someone on the radio last week who quoted Walt Disney who said, "Think beyond your lifetime." I began to think about what this means? What could I do, or how could I invest my time here on Earth so that even when I am gone, I will have left a legacy that would exceed the span of my life? Immediately my mind, of course, went to my children and the legacy that I try to leave with them through my daily life lessons that I share with them as well as through my words and my example. Then, to cast my net even wider, I invest in teachers--I spend my life preparing teachers, and I especially enjoy mentoring special individuals who soar in ways that are unimaginable and exceed all my expectations. These amazing teachers bless their students in immeasurable ways, and I am convinced that these students will then, in turn, grow up to be the leaders of tomorrow and will continue to change the world in positive ways. As I get older, I stop to think more and more beyond my lifetime...do you?
I started reading Coach John Wooden's book entitled Life Lessons On and Off the Court. Throughout the book, Coach Wooden, former UCLA basketball coach who led the team to 10 NCAA Championships, talks about how he taught his college players how to put on their socks and shoes. I tried to imagine this...a college coach instructing a group of men who were all over 6 feet tall how to smooth out their socks in order to prevent blisters and then how to double tie their shoes so that they would stay tied throughout their game. Coach Wooden explains that this was a fundamental step in preparing for the game--to have the athletes' "equipment" ready and to prevent injury while playing.
This basic lesson reminded me of how as a parent, I have observed how it is easy to assume that our children will know some fundamental skills in life, yet unless we intentionally pause to teach them, they may not ever learn some of these basic skills. With my own two sons, I have taught them how to give firm handshakes and to make direct eye contact when meeting people. I truly believe that this is a basic skill that contributes greatly to the first impression that you give when initially meeting someone. Many have commented about my sons' firm handshakes and have been impressed with their direct eye contact and introductory skills. Now I guess I need to teach them how to put on their socks and shoes too... This morninng I listened to a TED talk that was entitled "The Danger of a Single Story". The speaker talks about how we risk having a limited understanding of a people or culture if we are reliant only on single stories which describe them. Two quotes that the speaker shared stood out to me: 1) "The problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue but they are incomplete; they make one story become the only story." (13:19) 2) "The consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of diginity; it makes our recognition of our equal humanitiy difficult. It recognizes how we are different rather than how we are similar (13:59)" Our exchange student left today, and it feels like a member of my family has moved away. Just a month ago, I did not know this young man. We signed up for this program and selected Gonzalo by just reading his bio, seeing his picture in his application, and appreciating that he had a love for basketball and a dream to go to Vegas. We picked him up from a church parking lot, brought him into our home, and invited him to become part of our family just like that. Sometimes I don't even speak to people in the grocery store, let alone invite them into my home, yet, here we have. All kinds of positive karma, or good energy, have been produced from this amazing exchange. Talks of my sons going to Spain to visit Gonzalo one day, refreshing our lives by seeing it through Gonzalo's eyes, and the indescribable bonds of love and trust that were established between all of us in just one month. This has all made me stop to think how strangers can quickly become not just friends, but family. |
Dr. Stella ErbesDr. Stella Erbes is a teacher at heart. Her passion to teach and help others has led her to compose this site full of resources. Dr. Erbes is a university professor and teaches education courses which help prepare future teachers. She hopes that the lessons prepared here will lead her readers to exceptional food, unforgettable travel, and better living. Stop to Think
June 2018
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